I seem to be finding myself drifting lately. I’m not entirely sure why. I get caught up in other things, and I forget God. And I hate it.
Life without Him is empty, and dead. And sometimes it seems like other things can fill up His place, but they can’t. They truly cannot. Nothing can. Nothing but God can fill God’s place. And absolutely nothing can compare to His amazing love. Oh, His amazing love, that we can run into His open arms, what a relief, what a relief! That He will accept our burdens onto His own shoulders, the God of all creation, the One who deserves everything good. How is this, that He would relieve me of my own pain, caused by my own sin?
It’s not something that should be taken lightly, what I’ve been doing. I just pick the right time and place to pay any attention to God. And then, wow, who knew, it doesn’t really feel real when I finally look at Him, after so long apart, simply because it’s my duty. Simply because I don’t want to go to hell when I die.
When I spend less time with God, it seems like that empty time becomes filled with loneliness, with sadness, with yearning and longing. What a fool I am, that I haven’t even learned from my own mistakes. Even knowing everything apart from God is ugly and empty, I still accept worldliness before God.
Why skimp myself of God’s true love? Why run from God’s beautiful eyes, His beautiful arms, His beautiful hands, His beautiful face, His beautiful love? There’s no point. It doesn’t make sense.
I say I love God. Do I really? Do I love God like I claim to?
Sometimes I’m not sure.
And do you know what?
I am sick and tired of not being sure.
It’s time to be sure. It’s time to face God, to love Him, to replace worldly emptiness with Godly fullness. It’s time to turn from terror and let Love wrap His arms around me, and protect me for all eternity. It’s time to quite wanting earthly things and just want God. It’s time to stop filling my head with lies and learn more of the truth. The unshakable, undeniable, infallible Truth of God.
God, dear God, dear Jesus, dear God, beloved God–
I love You.
“His face is more handsome than any other. His eyes are filled with beauty. When He is angry, His eyes burn with nothing but love.
He is strongest. His touch is gentlest. He carries me, He wraps me in His arms and He sings me to sleep. His lullaby is more comforting than any other.
He is perfect. When I call, He runs to my side. He holds my hand, and when my enemies say they hate me, He whispers that He loves me. I love Him. He speaks endless words of comfort. He breathes into me and I want my heart to beat with His.
He is perfect. He is beautiful. I am in love with Him. I am His. He is everything. He is breathtaking. He is awesome. He brings light with every step. He is the peace in all our nightmares. He is the One who loves me. He is my Father.
He is my God.”
~September 17, 2011
That sings me to sleep
That take in them mine
That carry me
Rest for my heavy head
Pierced because of His love
Sweat with blood for me
Breathed life into me
Kiss my sin-pocked face
Perfect, deserving of
Much greater than me
Surrounds me, brings me peace
I do not deserve it
It is mine.
~September 25, 2011
“I feel like although God isn’t taking all the pain away, He is sharing the burden, and He is just pouring these immense feelings of love onto me. This love, this love of God, that just makes me want to fall on my face and sob. He loves me so much. He loves me so much. And I do that. I bow my head to the floor and I cry. I cry because oh, oh, this love, this holy love, this powerful love, this love that fills my senses and I cannot yet begin to fathom His awesome love.
God. God. Father. Lord. His is a name filled with power, filled with wonder. Holy, Holy, Holy is the Lord God Almighty. Who was. Who is. Who is to come.”
~September 27, 2011
Song and video by Leeland courtesy Youtube.com